


Icarus Falls

by asherranceoftheheart



Category: Jacksepticeye Universe, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: (will add more tags in the future), Angst, Blood, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Puppet!Chase
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:33:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 21,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23896855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asherranceoftheheart/pseuds/asherranceoftheheart
Summary: "You'll never leave me alone right?""You think I'd actually let you go?"A story about the slow descent and corruption of a lonely man, a demon who learns that bonds go both ways, brothers who deeply regrets their words spoken out of anger, and a conflicted man watching them all fall down from the distance. Here's a Puppet!Chase AU that was written with extreme self-indulgence so beware and read the tags before entering.
Relationships: Antisepticeye & Chase Brody, Chase Brody & Jack McLoughlin, Jack McLoughlin & Chase Brody, Sean McLoughlin & Sean McLoughlin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	1. What a Wonderful World!

Nearly an entire year has passed ever since his best friend had been rushed into this hospital and was declared to be under a comatose state without showing any sign that he was going to be waking up soon. The chemically clean smell of the hospital that originally made him sick now barely affected him. Don’t get him wrong, he still hated the smell but when you’re here every three days it stops affecting you and is basically just a part of the background like the constant beeping of the heart monitor that originally drove him rather mad.

He held Jack’s thin hand, pressing the cold palm against his cheek and closed his blurring eyes.

“I miss you so much…” Chase choked on the heavy, bitter tar of sadness clinging to the inside of his throat and the wire of thorns made out of his guilt constricting suffocatingly around his bleeding heart. “I should be the one in your place, not you… I’m the weakest, most useless one among all of us. It shouldn’t have been you.”

The stinging burn of his tears welled up in his closed eyes and he furiously blinked them away even as his body heaved with dry sobs.

_Pathetic…_

While all the others are out there trying to find the cure to help Jack wake up from his coma, he was stuck here moping around, constantly crying like a little crybaby…

_Powerless, useless, waste of space Chase…_

He snapped out of his self-deprecating thoughts when he felt something squeeze his hand lightly. If he hadn’t known better, he would have thought he was just imagining the action out of desperation. He looked at Jack’s sleeping face and humorlessly smiled. Somehow, even when the man was in the depths of his coma, Jack always knew whenever he wasn’t being kind to himself. When he was awake, he’d just painlessly whap him on his back or shoulders before pulling him into a tight hug to murmur against his hair that he’s going to be okay and that whatever mean thing he was telling himself wasn’t true.

_“Hey! Don’t think of yourself that way, Chaser. If it weren’t for you nobody’d be dragging Henrik off to sleep or to eat something for the entire day and would’ve just kept on working regardless of how much he was already suffering. Jackie wouldn’t have anyone to chill and relax with when he’s trying to take a break from his superhero job to remind him that he’s human and he needs to rest too. Nobody would be dragging Marvin, screaming and spitting like a cat, out of his stuffy bedroom to enjoy the day outside and to be nicer to others rather than continuing his foot in mouth syndrome. You’re important to us Chasey so please, **please** never think of yourself that way.”_

He could still hear Jack’s voice pleading with him while he used those silvery blue eyes to melt most of his self-doubt and self-hatred away… At least for the time being.

Chase laid his cheek on his crossed arms on top of the bed and he held Jack’s hand tightly as if he was afraid that the comatose man would disappear if he wasn’t watching over him carefully. The effects of sleepless nights, repeating extremely vivid nightmares, and the constant emotional and mental torment from Him finally took its toll on the weary man. A wave of exhaustion poured over his entire body and he could feel his eyelids being weighed down by fatigue.

He drifted off to sleep in mere seconds.

* * *

A hand was squeezing his cheeks and pulling them apart. Chase grumbled and attempted to turn over to the other side to escape the menace who was snickering at his futile attempts.

“Good morning Chasey Wasey,” he heard Jack coo at him mockingly in a tone used to humor babies. He hissed angrily when he felt a hand ruffling his bed hair furiously making it even _worse_ than usual. “Time to wakey and facey the day, sunshine!”

“Fuck off, Jack,” Chase grunted as he pulled up the blankets to cover his face and swatted the hand that tried to squeeze his cheeks again.

His only warning was a sigh before _someone_ was suddenly jumping on him and laying their entire body weight on the previously sleepy man. His eyes snapped open just as his blanket was forcefully pulled down and a pair of hands with wriggling fingers began to attack his ticklish sides. Chase began to squeal like a pig and squirmed like a worm trying to escape the smirking Jack’s trap while he howled with laughter.

“Jahahahahahack! Stahahahahahap!” Chase began to curse the snickering man who ruthlessly kept dancing and digging his fingers up and down the cursing-laughing man’s sensitive sides to hear him scream.

“Awwww, why should I? Look at you, you’re having so much fun right now!” Jack grinned down at the rapidly growing red face. “Coochie coochie coo!”

The older man only took mercy on Chase after his laughter had evolved into soundless screaming and he looked like he just stopped breathing with how hard he was laughing. Jack chuckled and rolled off the panting man’s body to flump over, spread-eagled to his other side. He draped an arm over Chase’s face and snickered when he shoved it away with an irritated grunt.

“You… are… a… _motherfucker_ ,” Chase huffed out every word with a hiss, righteous vengeance burning in those teary baby blue eyes that had Jack internally adding to his mental notes to watch out for the upcoming revenge from the other man. “I’m… going… to… **_fucking_** … _kill you._ ”

He propped himself up on an arm and teasingly poked Chase’s soft, flushed cheek with a grin.

“Is that any way to talk to your father, young man?” Jack dropped his voice in a teasing mockery of a stern father’s loving but scolding voice.

Chase rolled his eyes and gave Jack a look that could wither up an entire tree in three seconds.

“I didn’t realize you signed up for my child support, **_Dad,_** ” Chase narrowed his eyes dangerously and sassed him back with a sickly sweet smile and a voice dripping with poisoned honey. “I’m sure _Marvin_ would be **_very_** interested to find out about this little fact.”

This time it was Jack’s turn to shudder and look at the younger man with a little bit of fear. They both knew that if Marvin ever heard of their little jokes, he was **_not_** going to leave Jack in peace. That magician was determined to have Jack take responsibility as their ‘parent’ despite the fact that trying to get that legally acknowledged is going to be a piece of hell to explain. Not that that matters to Marvin of course. The prideful man could out-stubborn even a rock.

Jack pouted and Chase’s smile widened. This was definitely a win for Chase.

He smacked his palm over the little bastard’s smug face and yelped and gave Chase a disgusted look when he felt him lick his palm. He snagged his own hand away and wiped the saliva off his shirt while Chase sat up trying to pat down his fluffed up hair that was flying all over the place.

“You literally don’t know where this hand has been, you little shit.” Jack told Chase who arched an eyebrow at him and looked him dead in the eyes, no sign of regret or remorse over his previous action.

“What? Are you one of those crusty dirty bastards who never washed their hands when they go to the bathroom? Are you a crusty, dirty old man, Jack?” Chase taunted his creator who snapped and pounced on him to lock his head under his arms while he noogied his creation. “I’m going to tell Henrik you’re one of those dirty bastards and then you’ll get five hours worth of lecture for your crusty ass!”

“No you fucking won’t or I’ll tell Henrik that you haven’t been eating anything else other than Mac and Cheese for dinner for the past week just because he said that it wasn’t healthy for you and you, the complete child you are, decided to spite him because you said quote that Henrik is not the boss of you end quote.” Jack growled back at the other man who was still trying to pull his head out of his armlock.

Jack smirked victoriously when Chase stopped squirming and looked up at him with narrowed eyes.

“... Truce?” Chase finally decided after a few minutes of their stubborn staring contest. He was pouting sulkily.

Jack snorted and gave Chase’s hair another ruffle before he finally let him go, “Truce. Anyway, get your ass up. We’re supposed to be meeting the others for lunch outside today.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Chase grumbled but the next words still came out as easily as breathing to him. “Love you, bro.”

The words albeit it had been grumbled out was still painfully sincere. It lit up Jack’s weary face with a fond smile. He pulled Chase into a big hug and buried his face into that fluffy brown hair.

“Yeah… Love you too, Chaser.”

* * *

“...dy? Mister Brody, visitation hours are done,” Chase slowly, reluctantly stirred from the peaceful dream that he tried with all his might to never wake from.

He didn’t want to wake back up into the cold reality where he had to face that he was all alone and carrying what felt like the entire world on his aching back. He wanted to stay in that memory where his family was by his side and his closest friend and brother would be there to shake him awake ready to greet him with a smile and a lively spark in his eyes. However, he knew that he couldn’t postpone reality any further and he also knew that Jack and the others wouldn’t want to lose him to the world of bittersweet memories. There was no need to add one more unimportant baggage with another comatose friend to the other’s stress.

Chase forced himself to open his eyes and his hand was still loosely being squeezed by Jack in his sleep. That was the only reaction they ever got from him. He hoped that the others at least read his messages reporting Jack’s ‘progress’ over the past months. It’d be nice to try and be optimistic in believing that this means that Jack was slowly regaining his strength again.

“Good evening, Mister Brody,” Chase sat up at the sound of the familiar voice. He rubbed the crud made from sleep from his eyes to blink up at one of the doctors that had been assigned to care for Jack.

The man had neatly cut auburn hair, freckles dusting his pretty face like a night sky full of stars, and a pair of kind grey eyes. Doctor Adam often allows him to stay a bit later than usual for visitation hours, probably out of pity especially whenever he sees his god awful face.

“Evening Doc,” Chase muttered with a rough voice and glanced at the clock. He let out a groan and rubbed a hand down his face when he saw that the clock’s hands were pointing at nine o’clock. “Thanks for giving me an additional hour, Doc.”

The man just patted his shoulder and gazed at his comatose patient’s blank face. If one didn’t know better, they would think that Jack was merely in a deep sleep.

“You slept the entire day away since you came in before lunch. Have you been getting any sleep on your own, Mister Brody?” The gentle inquiry made Chase wince as he thought about his sleep schedule or rather to be more accurate, the complete lack of it. “Please try to get some rest by yourself. Nobody would be happy if you were to follow after your brother’s footsteps into this hospital.”

Chase sighed and rubbed a thumb on the back of Jack’s hand. It’s not like he can tell the doctor that sleeping peacefully and living well is not an option in a household where you have to deal with a demon who follows your every step, save for when he comes to this hospital, to torment you and push you around. Thank fuck Marvin used a powerful warding spell on this place before he and Jamie vanished on a trip to find a spell that could wake Jack up. He did ask his older brother why he couldn’t use the same spell around the house but Marvin explained that the hospital is connected to a powerful leyline so the spell is automatically powered to be kept up without his influence. The house doesn’t have the same advantage.

He understood his brother’s explanation and dismissed his own suggestion. He didn’t want to take up too much of Marvin’s energy when he should be focusing it on more important things. Marvin gave him one of his rare hugs and thanked him for his understanding before he was off. Jamie followed after him but not before staying back a bit longer to talk to him.

“Are you truly sure that you will be alright by yourself?” Jameson furrowed his brows as he asked his older brother. Chase plastered on a convincing smile and gave the youngest ego a hug before letting him go.

“Take care of our stubborn big brother. He’s a bit prickly but since you both have the soul bond he’s more likely to listen to you and be nicer to you. Keep yourselves out of trouble, okay?” Chase stood up on his toes to kiss Jameson on his forehead before gently pushing him towards the direction Marvin left. “Go. Don’t worry your head about me. I’ll be fine. You guys would be going through more dangerous tasks than I do.”

Jameson looked like he wanted to say something before he must have thought it wasn’t worth the effort before he gave him one last squeeze and a kiss dropped down on the crown of Chase’s head before he ran off to follow their magician.

He hasn’t heard anything from them in months but Chase knew that they were fine. If Anti had captured them, he would’ve been gloating about their unfortunate fate day in and day out into Chase’s ears.

“I’ll try to take care of myself, Doc.” He returned his mind back to the present and gave the concerned doctor a small smile. “You’re right. Nobody would want me to follow Jack here.”

‘At least… not yet,’ Chase’s dull eyes dimmed further at the dark whisper of his mind.

He stretched his arms out and faked a big yawn to hide the dullness of his eyes that were only accented by the dark raccoon-like black bags circling them. Chase stood up, gently prying Jack’s hand from his own, and leaned over to brush his chapped lips against the cold skin of his forehead. Sometimes, his morbid thoughts would rear in and tell him that he was basically caring for Jack’s corpse at this point. He brushed away his brother’s growing bangs from his thin face.

“His hair’s getting pretty long,” Chase idly commented as he twirled a brown lock around his pinky finger. “We should trim it soon.”

“We should,” he heard Doctor Adam walk behind him and grab his shoulder with a firm squeeze. “You look exhausted, Chase. Are you sure you’ll be fine going home on your own?”

The fussing from the other man painfully reminded Chase of the times Henrik would nag him over his health. He’d often tell him to call him or one of the other guys to come pick him up if he was too tired from his shoots to drive home on his own.

Poor Henrik… Ever since That Day, he had gone missing, probably spirited away by the demon that was tormenting all of them. Jackie followed soon after telling them tersely that he’s not coming back until he finds the other half of his soul bond. He did tell them to call him or text him if they managed to find a solution to Jack’s coma or if they found Henrik but other than that he had been ghosting them (or well, Chase) since he left. Chase wondered if the second leader of the group managed to find any other clues about Henrik other than that time when He managed to take over Jack’s tumblr to post the taunting images of a vacation postcard that grew bloodier and glitchier with every post edit before it was erased from existence as if it had never been there in the first place. He sent Marvin and Jackie messages about what happened but he has no way of knowing if they saw it or even believed him.

“I’ll be fine. I took a cab coming here,” Chase shrugged off the warm hand from his shoulder and pushed past the unresisting taller man’s body, “It’s getting late. I won’t get you into more trouble for letting me stay past visiting hours again.”

“You look like you’re only getting your good night’s sleep here and it’s not like you’re disturbing our patient,” Adam scratched the back of his head and gazed at the tired slump of Chase’s shoulders. “Be careful on your way home and please get something to eat… You haven’t eaten anything the entire day.”

Chase wisefully didn’t say that he hasn’t been having that much of an appetite to eat anything for the past months. Everything just tasted like cardboard in his mouth and it was taking him more energy to get food down into his stomach than any other activity. He still forces himself to try and eat something three times a day despite his lack of appetite. After all, you can’t hide extreme weight loss in a recorded video easily unlike the makeup he would expertly use to hide the black bags around his eyes. He does have to care for his body or else the community would notice that something was wrong.

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll eat something when I get home.” He waved off the doctor’s concerns and inclined his head towards Jack. “Bye Jackaboy… I’ll see you in three days.”

He looked back at the doctor who was now checking his patient’s numbers to see if there was anything they should be worried about or if there had been any positive change.

“Doc, please keep taking good care of my big brother.”

“Of course, you take care of yourself as well, Mister Brody.”

With one final glance at his brother’s face, he turned around and mustered up all the flimsy strength in his heart to prepare himself for the war that will greet him when he returned to that house.

* * *

Chase paid the cab driver his fare and gave him a nice tip for the smooth drive. Before he exited the cab, he bade the old man farewell and wished him a safe drive. He slid out of the car and closed the door behind him, watching the cab disappear off into the distance then told himself that he can’t keep putting the upcoming event off. He deeply breathed in, his lungs expanding with the chill of the evening breeze before letting it out slowly through his nose to calm his racing heart.

He looked up into the darkened windows of the house, the lack of light giving it a more ominous look even before he caught sight of a pair of green eyes watching him from the windows on the second floor. There was unrestrained delight in those eyes as they relished in the sight of his obvious fear and internal conflict that kept him from moving his frozen legs to enter the house.

“Stop being such a wuss, Chase,” he whispered to himself as he swallowed around the lump in his throat and forced his shaking legs to walk up to the front door.

He unlatched the collection of keys swaying from its place on his front belt loop and flipped through them before coming to a stop on the front door key. He fumbled with it, trying to stall for more time, and inserted the item into the keyhole. The man hesitated for a second, knowing just what awaited him behind that door before he gritted his teeth and forced himself to turn the key. The click of the lock opening sounded like the bell that would sound for one’s death. He pulled the key out and reached over to wrap his sweaty hand around the ice cold steel surface of the doorknob and slowly pushed the door open.

The pitch darkness of the hallway made him feel small and helpless to whatever lurks within its shadows. He resisted the urge screaming at him to turn around and run back to the hospital with his tail tucked between his legs. He dug his nails in his palms, forming faint crescents, before he stepped inside the dark house and closed the door behind him. The hair behind his neck rose along with the goosebumps on his arms. Someone was watching him.

The feeling of being watched has grown worse now that he stood all alone in the dark. It was as if His eyes were everywhere, focusing their unblinking gaze upon his shaking form. He leaned back against the closed front door and fumbled blindly for the lock. He already has enough in his own plate dealing with the being lurking in this house that he doesn’t want to deal with impromptu home invasions. He switched the lock up.

“... I’m back,” he doesn’t know why he kept doing this even though he knew that only one person (and it was his most disliked and feared person at that) would be there to listen. His words carried through the still air of the house and Chase grimaced when he heard the previously subtle static grow louder as He approached.

He shook his head and gathered up the shattered pieces of his courage and journeyed on to the kitchen. While he doesn’t have the appetite, he could still make do with a sandwich or two for food. He’d flick on whatever light switch he’d encounter on his way to the kitchen and he began to lose some of the tension in his muscles as the dark house soon brightened up. Don’t get him wrong. He’d never fully turn off his guard while he’s outside of the hospital’s warded boundaries but light always had a way of easing some of his worries and burning away a little bit of that fear.

When he reached the kitchen, he headed straight for the cupboard to grab a box full of teabags to get a kettle started up. He used whatever flavor his hand could snag from the box first before putting the other teabags back in the cupboard. Then he walked over to the fridge and opened its door to look at his selection of food.

Normally, if this had been the past and he had the energy and enthusiasm, he would’ve been cooking homemade food because it was his favorite activity other than filming videos and trickshots, playing the piano, or doodling or sketching something that caught his interest. However, it’s been a while since he did any of those hobbies. He didn’t really have any room in his energy output to be able to invest some time in his own passions.

Most of what was inside the fridge delivered fast food and a rare takeout box. Occasionally he’d get the energy to eat outside since he was sick of the silence of the house but that happens probably twice or thrice a month.

He wasn’t in the mood for anything especially heavy so he chose the club sandwich that came with his ordered salad a week ago. He gave it a careful sniff and shrugged when it smelled pretty normal.

When he closed the fridge’s door, he didn’t react to His sudden appearance behind it.

“Hello, little Brody,” the demon purred, His creepy inhumane wide smile stretching out further until it looked like it was about to split His face apart when He saw his hand tightly gripping his sandwich. “Did you have fun visiting Jack today?”

Chase swallowed the biting words ‘Don’t say his name’ down his throat to let it sit heavily in his stomach. He found that the best way to cope with the demon’s presence was to ignore Him and give Him no attention until He grows bored of you for the rest of the day. It’s not a perfect tactic. Sometimes it angers Him and Chase is left with new bruises covering up the side of his back that makes it difficult to sit in a hard chair but he made do. He turned around without looking back at the smiling demon and returned to the whistling kettle. The strong fragrance of peppermint filled the room and its scent lessened some of Chase’s drowsiness. He turned off the heat and poured himself a cup of tea before going to the living room.

“Still ignoring me, Chaser?” The high pitched giggles grated on Chase’s nerves and ears but he determinedly pretended that nobody was shadowing his steps, blowing little puffs of cold air behind his neck. He gritted his teeth and stopped his twitching arm from spinning him around and striking Him on the face. That would just encourage Him to retaliate.

He hastened his brisk pace and placed the cup of scalding tea on the table before collapsing on the couch. He reached out to grab the remote control of the TV from the table before turning it on and navigated the screen to Netflix. He decided to continue watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine and maybe even bring some cheer to himself. His dull blue eyes never wavered from the screen in spite of the intent, sneering gaze burning a hole through him coming from the side. He only leaned over to pick up the mug that was still smoking hot.

“Have you finally received any notice from the cowardly magician and fake hero that they’ve actually read your messages or are they still pretending that you have no important information to tell them?” The demon crooned, His poisonous words managing to directly hit all of the weak points of Chase’s insecurities.

His hand tightened around the mug's handle. He felt Him shuffle closer almost until their arms were touching together.

_Ignore Him Chase. Ignore Him. He’s just taunting you. He’s just trying to get a rise out of you. You know His games. You’ve been playing it since December last year. He is lying to you. Do **not** believe His lies._

“Leaving you with no way of contacting them for emergencies, ignoring all of your calls and messages… One would think that you’re just an unimportant nuisance to them,” He giggled, He was so close now that Chase could feel the static that clung to His presence teasingly sparking up against the skin of his arms. “Such _loyal_ and _loving_ brothers you have there, Chaser.”

He suddenly grew hyper aware of the heaviness of his phone that had been stuck in his front pocket for the entire day. He didn’t power up the thing ever since he woke up this morning until he was sitting in the taxi cab on the way back. He texted Marvin and Jackie’s number to give them the weekly updates on Jack even if there hasn’t been any change at all. He began to type out that He has been haunting him and stared down at that part of the message with a blank gaze before he erased the parts mentioning how he was actually doing and just said that he’s been fine if not a bit tired.

Sometimes, when Chase was feeling a bit selfish, he wished that they would send him back something, even if it’s just the single letter K to tell him that they’ve been reading his messages. Originally, he told them about his daily nightmares about Him and how He was starting to show His presence around him but the lack of replies felt… cold and uncaring. It felt like he was annoying them about his complaints and should just suck it up. It wasn’t like He was kidnapping him or anything.

So he stopped. He only texted them now for reports on Jack’s state.

His head was beginning to hurt, more specifically the side of his head was beginning to hurt like a bitch. Ah. He was getting too emotional.

He bit down on his tongue, the pain snapped him out of the emotional downhill he was starting to fall into and to stop him from snapping at the demon and defend his brothers from the lies that He was spewing from His grinning mouth.

“Stubborn, so stubborn… You do know that everyone considers you as the weakest link of the group right?” Chase felt the shivers run up and down his spine when those ghostly fingers began to brush the top of his hair. “Poor useless, _powerless_ little brother… You lost the only person who stood by your side while the others who swore to be your brothers abandoned you, left you to face the monster all on your own.”

Chase abruptly stood up, the mug that was filled with tea that had gone cold fell over to the floor as his loosened grip let go of it, the sound of his racing heartbeat roaring in his ears while he tried to ignore the demented cackling coming from his tormentor. His words kept bouncing around his head and in a futile attempt to forget it, he held up the ruined sandwich that he had unknowingly crushed in his hand and tore into it.

“You can’t run away from the truth, Chaser.” He crooned right next to his ears, His dark presence loomed over his shaking body. “I truly do wonder if the others would actually come to your rescue if you cried for their help?”

Chase looked down at the remaining pieces of the sandwich in his hand and at the feel of cold tea on his feet.

His sandwich tasted like ash in his mouth.

* * *

Chase ran his fingers through his wet hair and walked out of the shower, wiping off his wet feet on the bathroom mat so that he won’t accidentally slip and crack his skull on the toilet. Knowing Him, He’d probably just laugh His ass off at his own stupidity and then the last thing that he would see would be that demon’s grinning face. That would be a shitty end to an already shitty life.

When he said that the hospital was the only safe place in the world against Him, he was sort of lying. For someone as creepy as He was, He still doesn’t invade the bathroom space especially when he’s taking a bath so that’s one place he can have some temporary peace whatsoever. It’s not that **_everything_** stops when he’s in there. Like…

Chase looked at the mirror and saw that he was crying tears of blood again. He reaches up, wiping the crimson liquid away from his cheeks, feeling the squish of the blood on his fingers, and spreads the mess all over his face. However, when he looked down he already knew what sight was waiting for him.

His fingers were clean.

When he looked back up into the mirror, there was not a shred of evidence that blood had been streaming down his cheeks a few seconds ago.

It was sickeningly funny in a fucked up way how such a thing that would’ve incited extreme panic attacks and mental breakdowns in the beginning barely fazed him anymore. He squeezed his dry fingers together and sighed. After all, there were worse things to panic about other than illusory tears of blood at this point in his life.

After their little one-sided conversation in the living room, Chase decided to take out his airpods and plug them up to his ears while he cleaned up the mess his tea made on the floor and finished up the remaining tea on the kettle and his smushed up sandwich. He could see Him snickering at his valiant attempts of ignoring Him at the corner of his eyes but Chase just averted his sight and began singing loudly to the lyrics of the songs screaming against his ears. Once he chugged down his tea, forced the tasteless sandwich down his throat, and cleaned up his mess, he dragged himself upstairs and decided to go for a hot shower before going to ‘sleep’.

The heat was both a comfort and a hit on the face about how this entire bullshit situation was the reality that he has to live with. A comatose best friend, a missing brother, a demon haunting nearly every second of his day poking at every raw wound of insecurity in his psyche, and a bunch of distant brothers who were too busy with their own respective tasks to listen to him… A tiny part of him wanted the ex-wife and children in his backstory to be real so that he could at least worry about something else other than the supernatural stuff but the bigger part of him wasn’t cruel enough to wish this messed up situation on anyone just because he wanted to feel a little less lonely.

He stepped out of his shower once his skin turned slightly red from the temperature of the water. No doubt he’s going to feel the rawness and sensitivity of his skin in the morning if he wasn’t feeling emptier than usual but for now, he just didn’t care. He changed into an oversized clean blue shirt and black shorts after he finished drying his hair with a towel and walked out into his bedroom.

The place was what you would frankly call a Mess. Dirty clothes formed into small mountains all around the corners of the room, a bunch of dirty mugs and plates sat on the table, his laptop in sleep mode settled on top of his unmade bed, and a trashcan full of empty packets of chips and snacks that he couldn’t be bothered to take out. Chase looked around his room and could just imagine Henrik or Jack’s fussing over him and the mess. They’d drag him out of his bed and help him clean out his room or get some sunshine.

God… _He missed them so much…_

He trudged over to his bed and replaced his laptop over to the floor. He slipped under the sheets and crossed his arms under his head while he stared up into the dark ceiling of his room. He could feel His gaze staring right at him, watching him do nothing if not for the sole purpose of reminding him that he’s not alone.

…

Would it be fucked up if he said that some part of him was glad that He was there? Save for the people in the hospital and his other absent brothers, everybody thought that he was Jack. He couldn’t let it be known that the man was in a comatose state as that would just bring more questions than reasonable answers that they could answer with. He has to pretend to be him in front of the public because nobody needs Chase but a lot of people need Jack.

The demon was the only one outside of the hospital to acknowledge that he was Chase and it’s so disgustingly, _pathetically_ refreshing to him. He was the only one who ever calls him by his name now and it helps him remember that he wasn’t Jack, he could never be Jack.

Maybe after all this is over… If he’s still alive by then, he’ll dye his hair an outrageous color again so that nobody would ever make the mistake of calling him Jack.

“Oh Chaser~” He hates that the nickname that held such fond memories for him was now tainted by the eight months of hearing it being hissed out with mockery by the demon who couldn’t help but ruin everything that previously made him so happy. “Still giving me the cold shoulder while you’re about to sleep? How _rude_.”

Chase closed his eyes and turned over to lay on his stomach and bury his face into his pillows. He felt the side of the bed dip as He sat on it. Still, he feigned deafness to the sound of static popping and hissing in his ears while he tried to force himself to go to sleep. He felt his entire body tense when a painfully familiar hand started to play with his hair in the same way as Jack often did to him in the past.

“You’re lucky I’m in an indulging mood today, Chaser,” His voice dropped while His static grew louder. The hand that had been gently playing with his hair suddenly tugged on the strands while claws threateningly grazed his scalp. “On any normal day, I wouldn’t have stood for such disrespect.”

The healing bruises all over his body twinged at the same time while he listened to those words.

‘I know,’ Chase thought numbly. ‘I know that very well.’

The touch lightened once more now that He had delivered His message effectively. As those fingers glided down his hair to massage the weak spot behind his neck, he couldn’t resist melting against those hands. Unconsciously, he had moved his body closer to the gentle touches that his body has been craving for _months_. He wanted to laugh at the sad fact that the only physical contact he has felt over the past year came from the demon who also hurt him every single day. He heard Him chuckle as he chased His touch greedily.

“There, there, big brother’s here with you now,” Chase shuddered as He impeccably imitated Jack’s loving tone, tears springing up from behind his closed lids when he couldn’t stop the wounded whine that just escaped him. “Shh… You’re tired aren’t you, Chase? Go to sleep. I’ll keep you company for the night.”

He should be fighting this. He shouldn’t be taking any fake comfort from the demon… But he wasn’t strong enough like the others and he was so, _so_ lonely... So they’ll forgive him if he gave in just a few times right?

“You think too much,” Chase sniffled at the perfect copy of the way Jack would express his fond exasperation while helping him go back to sleep after one of those terrible nightmares.

It hurts. It hurts that this feels like his big brother never left but he knew perfectly well that this was just another cruel game He was playing with him.

“Goodnight, Chaser,” He whispered into his ears while He continued to pet his head.

“Goodnight… Jack.”


	2. Heat Haze Days

He was burning.

His head felt like it was a plugged up kettle, waiting to burst forth with the built-up pressure from the heat attempting to push out with a loud bang. His throat felt like he had swallowed up a mixture of burning coals and sandpaper. His skin was so sensitive that the previously comfortable weight of the comforter on his body was now suffocating and its cloth scratched roughly against his skin.

It was all too much! The mixture of pain and overstimulation drove him to kick the blankets off his body although that had probably been the worst action he could’ve taken right now. The sudden movement seemed to have taken out all the air in his lungs and he wheezed and curled up into a ball on his bed. His teeth clicked and chattered loudly while he shivered and trembled despite the fire that was burning a trail through his veins.

Through the heated haze of his mind, he knows that he has to go take his own temperature and find the meds that are in the other room. So with a loud groan scraping up his raw throat, he uncurled from his ball and attempted to sit up on the side of the bed. However, if it was as if he suddenly lost all control and strength in his shaking limbs and he careened forwards into the thankfully carpeted floor with a loud crash.

“Oh fuck, Chase!” He heard muffled stomping footsteps run towards him before two strong arms pulled him up to lean him back against the bed.

Chase opened up the eyes that he didn’t even notice he had closed and blinked hazily at the pair of grey-blue eyes gazing at him with concern.

“J-Jack?” Chase whispered hoarsely through the lump that had formed in his throat.

The man before him blinked, confusion darkening his eyes at the lost look that had shifted over Chase’s glazed expression.

“I mean… Yeah? Who else would it be? Henrik? The guy who practically lives in the hospital?” The man snorted and gave him a light-hearted smile. “I’m your only housemate, remember?”

Right… Right. Jackie, Marvin, and Henrik lived in their own places while Chase lived with Jack because they both didn’t like being alone. Originally, Chase had been planning on moving out a few weeks after he had been ‘born’ but he and Jack came to like being housemates too much and it just never happened.

Jack sighed and smiled when he saw the recognition click in Chase’s eyes. He pressed their foreheads together as they normally did when they were comforting the other before he yelped and jerked back with a flinch.

“Yikes! You’re burning up like the sun there, Chasey,” the older man rubbed his own forehead with a frown before he slipped his arms under Chase’s body and lifted him back up onto his bed.

He ran his fingers through the feverish man’s sweat matted hair, untangling some of the knots that tried to hamper his hand’s movements. Jack reached into his pocket and brought out his smartphone.

“Wait a sec there, would you? I’m going to get our thermometer and call our resident Doc to ask what I should do with you?” Jack covered his heated eyes with a cold hand and Chase closed them in bliss as it soothed the fire.

He must have drifted off for a small bit because the next time he opened his eyes, it was to the feel of something metallic being pressed into the hole of his ear and he heard a tiny beep before it was removed. He heard Jack click his tongue and murmur something too low for him to hear before he felt his bed dip at the other man’s weight.

Chase rolled over to his side and moved closer to Jack. He buried his face against his older brother’s side with a sigh before Jack moved him so that he was laying his head on his lap. Jack started to play with his hair again, digging his fingers deep into his scalp to relieve some of the painful tension drilling insistently from the inside of his head.

“I missed you so much,” Chase whimpered deliriously before he began to cry.

“Oh Chase… Why would you miss me when I haven’t left your side in the first place? You were probably just having a terrible nightmare that seemed to be lasting forever because of your fever,” Jack wiped away his tears and snot with the tissue he pulled from the nearby box. He leaned down and brushed his lips against Chase’s heated forehead before straightening back up. “Schneep said we’ll have to lower your temperature with the good old cold towel later on after I’ve given you your meds.”

Jack gave him an indulgent smile when his face twisted at the prospect of having to taste the bitter aftertaste of the medicine being washed down by bland water. His caretaker nudged him gently to warn him that he was about to move him before he helped the sick man sit up against the headboard, giving him stability in the form of the pillows he propped up on his back.

“Don’t worry, Chaser. I know how much you hate the taste of medicine so before I came back up, I heated up a bowl of the leftover chicken soup from the fridge to help you swallow your medicine down.” Jack told him before he stood up. “Wait there while I get the bowl from the microwave downstairs.”

“Not like I can move anyway,” Chase slurred his words, blinking drowsily at his brother who chuckled and patted him on the head before he walked away.

He was left by himself in the silence of his room. Chase reached up to touch his forehead where Jack’s touch continued to linger like a burning mark. How long has it been since he had been touched this gently? How much longer has it been since somebody took care of him while he was sick rather than him just stumbling into the other rooms and downstairs to nurse himself back to health?

_A terrible nightmare…_

It certainly would be one wouldn’t it? A demon haunting him and his family, a brother who’s basically trapped in a Sleeping Beauty curse type of sleep, a missing brother who was spirited away by the mentioned demon, and his other distant brothers who were having adventures in god knows where…

Before he could even allow himself to think deeper on that line of thought, Jack came back holding a steaming bowl of soup in his hands, the fragrance coming from the food awakened the monster that was his stomach.

**_G R O W L_ **

He could see the growing mirth in his brother’s eyes but he ignored it. Previous thoughts forgotten and vanished like a wisp in the air in favor of concentrating on sating the ravenous hunger that seemed to have possessed him. Chase’s eyes followed the bowl like a predator stalking his prey. Jack teasingly moved the bowl around and snickered when his sick brother’s baby blue eyes never lost sight of it.

“Looks like somebody is hungry,” Jack teased his brother who in a sudden burst of childishness stuck his tongue out at him. “Cranky too, I see.”

“I will fuck you up,” Chase vowed with the fire and spite only a younger sibling could muster up against their older sibling. He narrowed his eyes at Jack but only succeeded in looking more like he was constipated.

He sulked when Jack tweaked his nose as if he was just the cutest little thing and heard him chuckle at his scowl.

“Sure you will,” Jack patted his flushed cheek with the most patronizing spirit an older sibling would use to infuriate their cute younger sibling. “I’m sure you’re going to fuck me up when you can’t even crawl on your stomach without feeling like you’re about to die.”

Jack left him there to sulk crankily at the face of the harsh truth he just laid on him while he went to the bathroom to get a towel to place on Chase’s body just in case they spilled his food. His caretaker settled the tower over his body making sure that most of his lap and chest are covered before dragging a nearby chair to sit beside Chase’s side. He scooped up a spoonful of soup and blew on it until it was warm and not scalding on the tongue.

“Want me to do the here comes the train schtick?” Jack sarcastically asked while holding up the spoon.

“Excuse me, you know I like the airplane one better,” Chase huffed petulantly before opening his mouth.

Jack made sarcastic airplane noises before he fed the soup to his brother, “Don’t choke on your veggies now, you big baby.”

Chase chewed on his food spitefully slow before making a show of swallowing it down.

“But _Daddy_ ,” even if it will kill his throat, Chase forced himself to pitch his tone up into a perfect copy of a whining child’s voice, “I wanna eat **_now_**!”

He watched with unrestrained glee as Jack nearly lost his grip on the bowl at his lap and threw his head back with a loud cackle. He had to place the bowl down on the bedside drawer while he curled in on his stomach from the force of his cackling. Jack slammed his hand down on the bed and grip the blankets tightly while his body shook in his attempt to calm himself down.

“You son of a bitch,” Jack panted as he finally reduced his cackles to giggling before he reached over to lock Chase’s head under his arms and heavily mussed up the extremely proud-looking man’s hair in spite of his outraged squeals. “Alright then **_son_** , open your mouth for Daddy. Here comes your airplane!”

He let go of his victim’s head and grabbed the bowl again. He scooped up another spoonful of soup again and began making it fly all over, taking care not to spill anything, before he led it back to Chase. If Chase didn’t feel like he’s going to die if he busted a gut laughing, he’d probably be keeled over on the bed wheezing like Jack had been earlier.

If Henrik was here, he’d be rolling his eyes at their dumbass antics.

Chase opened his mouth waiting for Jack to place the food in and looked at the other with a confused blink when the other man seemed to have gone into a stupor and stared at him with a dumbfounded look before he inhaled sharply and let out a sharp snicker. However, Jack didn’t elaborate on the weird pause, only snorting and snickering when Chase asked him about it.

It took them nearly an entire hour before the bowl was cleared of every drop of soup because of their teasing and horsing around, and Chase had finally taken his medicine while making a disgusted face the entire time he could feel the pill moving down his throat. In spite of still feeling like absolute garbage, his chest was warm not with the fever but with the happiness pulsing through his veins. His headache slash migraine is still there but it was being offsetted by the light-headedness that came from the drug like high of being given all the physical and verbal affection that he’s been craving from his best friend.

Jack helped him change into lighter clothes after noticing that his pajamas were soaked with his sweat. He said that Henrik mentioned that’s a good thing since it’ll help cool down his insides but it can’t be comfortable being weighed down by sweat-soaked clothes. Jack helped him drink a few glasses of water while rubbing his back to help him swallow down the stale taste and murmured small words of praises of how he’s being so good and how he’s so proud of him that eased most of the discomfort that he was feeling.

After asking him if he needed to go to the bathroom to which he replied in the negative, Jack helped him lay on his back again. The man smoothed his sweat matted hair back and told him that he’s going downstairs to wash the soup bowl and get fresh cold water to wipe him down with.

Chase blinked up at his ceiling in a dazed manner. He probably looked like he was drunk out of his mind right now with his half-lidded glazed blue eyes, the still prominent feverish flush on his cheeks, and his doped out silly grin that hasn’t faded ever since the fun that he just had. His mind kept replaying the past hour over and over almost obsessively to the point that he nearly didn’t notice his brother come back from his previous task. He heard footsteps and turned his head to blink at Jack who was now holding a wash basin that he was carrying carefully into the room. He placed it on top of the bedside drawer before bringing out the ear thermometer.

“Turn your head a bit,” Jack tapped his cheek with cold fingertips.

Chase turned his head to the side so that Jack could use the thermometer on his ear. He heard the soft click of a button being pushed and a few seconds later, the thing beeped and he felt it being removed.

“Thirty nine point one celsius… At least it’s gone down by point four.” Jack hummed to himself before he turned his body over to the wash bowl and slipped off the white towel that had been draped over his shoulders to dunked it into the water.

The sound of cloth being submerged into water before it was wrung out reached Chase’s ears. He turned his face back into the front position just as Jack lifted the wet towel up and started to dab the blissfully cold cloth all over his face and neck. Chase closed his eyes with a content sigh while Jack dunked the towel again and wrung out all the water before folding it into a small rectangle to place it on his forehead.

“That feels… nice…” Chase slurred his words while he blindly reached out for Jack’s hand and was rewarded by the man knotting their fingers together.

“It does, doesn’t it?” He could hear the smile on Jack’s voice.

They stayed in that position in silence while Jack would occasionally change the towel after it had lost its cold temperature.

“Where’s the others?” Chase suddenly asked, his drifting mind thinking of their other brothers especially Henrik who must be worried out of his head whenever he hears that one of them was sick.

“They’re busy with things but they might come by if they have some free time,” Jack answered while he rubbed the back of Chase’s hand in soothing circles.

“Mkay,” Chase muttered and they were silent again.

He must have drifted off for a few minutes again because he didn’t even notice that Jack had left for a bit before he was startled out of the sleepy haze at the sound of his brother cursing and something dropping on top of the bedside drawer loudly.

“Ah shit, I woke you up didn’t I?” Jack looked dismayed when he noticed that Chase’s eyes snapped open and was blinking at him owlishly. “Sorry Chaser, I stubbed my toe on your bed.”

“‘S okay,” Chase yawned and sleepily watched Jack as he sat back down in his previous position and made a new fresh towel to place it back on his forehead before looping their fingers together again. “Changed the water?”

“Yeah, you actually napped for an hour,” his brother smiled down at him and reached over with his free hand to pull the blanket up to his chin. “Sorry I woke you up.”

Chase doesn’t mind. He closed his eyes again, still feeling extremely fatigued from his sickness. They stayed there in silence. He could feel Jack’s gaze intently watching him and normally, he’d make a quip about how he’s being a little creep now he just felt comforted and safe under his watchful eyes.

“Hey Jack?” Chase cut through the silence with a whisper.

“Hm?” He felt him lean closer to hear him better.

“You’re… not going to leave right?” Chase peeked one eye open to watch Jack’s reaction.

His brother’s face was pensive as he considered the question that he laid on him out of nowhere. Then Jack huffed and tweaked his nose again, Chase just scrunching it up as a response to the by now another one of his brother’s affectionate slash teasing gestures towards him.

“Course not, if I left who’d nag you to death about taking better care of yourself?” Jack smirked and tapped the reddening spot on the tip of his nose. “You’re not getting rid of me for a _very, **very** _long time, Chaser.”

Chase’s lips quirked up into a tiny but adoring smile at his words. He relaxed back onto the bed and closed his eyes. Now that the serotonin rush has fully faded away, he felt himself crashing harder than he’s ever crashed before. The exhaustion from his stressful days (or was it nightmares?) and his fever dragged him down into that weird tiny barrier between the worlds of sleep and the waking.

“I love you, Jack,” Chase murmured and finally gave in to the persistent tugging of sleep.

* * *

Now that Chase had fallen into deep sleep, ‘Jack’ allowed his long ruse to fully drop. Those kind blue-grey eyes shifted back into acid green eyes that blankly stared down at the sleeping form. The friendly face that had comforted Chase so much lost the layered over illusion of softness as it was replaced by harder, sharper features that were accented by the sneer that was twisting down his lips.

Chase didn’t see his closest friend turn back into the monster that had been making his life a living hell for nearly an entire year. But then again… Chase never noticed that his neck had been wrapped with blood-stained bandages or the infamous black shirt and ripped jeans that would’ve been a dead giveaway that he wasn’t his Jack.

Was the blindness due to deliriousness brought about by his fever or was it willful blindness for the sake of allowing himself to be fooled so long as he kept up the happy ruse?

Anti looked down at their joined hands with disdain, observing the way Chase clutched it as if he or rather ‘Jack’ was his personal lifeline. However, despite the venomous look, he didn’t even attempt to pry it off.

“How annoyingly clingy,” the demon drawled yet oddly enough his harsh words only had half the poison it would normally have.

‘Is this why you’re so protective over him, Jack? Because he needed you more than you needed him?’ The demon asked the other who he knows would rather cut off his tongue than answer such questions. He sat there among the silence, absentmindedly rubbing the back of Chase’s hand with a thumb.

He stayed still for a few more minutes, head inclined to the side as if trying to listen for a voice that would never come.

Silence.

Anti huffed and smirked coldly at the wall, ‘You’re **_pathetic_** , Jack.’

He looked down at the younger ego when he heard him mutter something unintelligible under his breath. He tilted his head to the side, green eyes making note of the small shivers through Chase’s body and the slight wheezing. His mind went back to the past few hours where a spark burned bright as the sun in the man’s normally dull blue eyes. That happiness had been rather… infectious.

Anti scrunched up his nose in disgust.

“ ** _You’re_** even more pathetic,” Anti muttered angrily towards the sleeping man. “Falling apart just because you’re alone… This is why you’re the weakest link.”

He doesn’t understand why Chase had been so relaxed around him just because he so earnestly believed that he was Jack and easily believed his half-hearted lie that the past few months had just been a fever-induced vivid nightmare. Sure he was sick but Anti didn’t even try hiding most of his physical cues save for his eyes and softening the curves of his face.

Chase clung to him but it wasn’t really _him_ that he was holding on to, he attached himself to Anti with the stubbornness of a leech and looked up at him with those deliriously happy eyes but he knew that the person Chase was seeing was the person that Anti hated the most in this entire universe.

Anti growled and scratched the side of his itching neck as something in him seemed to twist and curl with an emotion that he couldn’t _quite_ identify himself. He had been so busy trying to comprehend the odd, irritating emotion that was buzzing beneath his skin that his soul nearly glitched out of his body when Chase moved in his sleep again and was now hugging his hand like a teddy bear, nuzzling his still flushed cheek against Anti’s hand. He watched the idiot’s towel slide down his face to the bed, creating a wet spot on the mattress.

…

He was starting to drool.

The eldest ego resisted the urge to sigh.

“It’s rather ironic what I barely even had to put any effort in our little game,” Anti tried to push his face back with a finger on his cheek but Chase just scowled in his sleep and nuzzled Anti’s hand in a more aggressive manner. “Clingy little bastard… I wonder if you’d still snuggle my hand this hard if you know where that thing’s been?”

Not that he wouldn’t know the answer to that considering little Chase practically hates his guts. If the younger ego had been more aware of his surroundings, he would have recoiled from his touch as if he had been burned by fire and would have spat insults trying to hide the wounded, almost feral gleam in those blue eyes.

It was interesting how his plans could change just on a single whim. Originally, he planned on merely inflicting worse nightmares on the man’s feverish psyche and messing with his senses when he’d stumble around the house trying to find the medicine and other materials he’ll need to bunk up in his bed to bear the sickness but then… He took one look at Chase’s panting, feverish state and he wondered just how far would he be able to take pretending to be his saintly older brother before the sick man would notice anything.

The answer to that is **_a lot_**.

Anti was willing to admit to himself that he did get too into his own acting out of his anticipation of witnessing the sheer fury, the denial, and the shattered visage of this man as he realized that he clutched so sweetly, so _desperately_ to the demon who had been the main cause for his daily hell.

He wondered just what exactly Chase would do once he finally gave up the ruse. Would he scream his throat hoarse or until he was coughing out blood? Would he charge at him, seeing only red and thinking only of lashing out at the demon who fooled him, or would he run away like the coward that he was? Would he place his hands over his ears and tightly close his eyes while he shook his head in utter denial or what just happened? Or would he cry and cry and cry until he had no tears left and his spirit had been shredded into pieces?

An eerily wide smile slowly began to stretch out across his face as he tightened his grip around Chase’s hand. He lifted the drying towel from its fallen position and soaked it in the plastic bowl. The demon took his time wringing out the water from the towel before he began to wipe it gently, almost tenderly, all over Chase’s face.

“You better give me a nice show worth remembering later on, baby brother,” Anti cooed sweetly and pressed the cold towel over the sleeping man’s cheek. “Who know? Perhaps you might even surprise me. If you do… I will be very _very_ pleased.”

Anti leaned over and pressed a small kiss on the top of Chase’s head, the brown fluff tickling his nose.

“Enjoy those sweet dreams while you can, clingy little puppet.”

* * *

Jack woke him up a few hours later to get the next dosage of his fever medicine. He was feeling much better compared to his previous bout of consciousness to the point that he didn’t need Jack’s help to go to the bathroom.

Chase leaned on the doorway of the bathroom after washing his hands and grimaced as the world lightly spun around him and the ground on his feet slowly began to disappear. This is why he hated getting sick. Even doing the simplest tasks makes him feel like he was one of those IPhones that would go from one hundred to thirty percent battery in two minutes just because he accidentally left the screen brightness a little bit higher than usual.

His caretaker was waiting for him on his bed, watching the other man play with his phone before he finally noticed him.

“What’re you doing over there?” Jack then gestured for him to come near with a wave of his hand and patted the free space on his side. “Come on over.”

“I’m gonna get you sick,” Chase protested weakly but still he walked over to his bed and slid into the space that Jack made for him. He maintained a few inches of distance between him and the healthy man.

Jack rolled his eyes and shuffled closer so that they’re shoulder to shoulder.

“Then we’ll just do the sick bro solidarity while Hen takes care of us and calls us dumbasses while cursing our existence the entire time.” Jack chirped while he waved his phone around. “By the way, Henrik sends his regards.”

His tone took an odd turn at the last sentence. Jack was wearing a secretive smile with a gleam in his eyes like he was laughing at a joke that only he could understand. Chase squinted at him suspiciously but thinking too hard on whatever his brother was implying was far too painful for his head. Jack ‘rewarded’ his suspicious look with a finger flick on his forehead.

“Hey!” Chase yelped and grumbled while he rubbed the stinging skin. “What’s with the weird tone and smile? Did you play a prank on Henrik or something?”

Jack let out a loud bark of laughter at his rapidly fired questions.

“Man, you’re getting pretty smart. That means you’re getting better!” Jack’s smile widened and it took on that same odd twist that slightly unnerved Chase earlier. “As for Henrik… Yeah, let’s just say I pulled a pretty neat prank on him. His reactions are starting to get boring and predictable though.”

“He’s going to kill you,” Chase stated as a matter of fact, his tone just sending Jack into another fit of giggles.

“I’d like him to actually try,” Jack smirked before turning over to relax on his back and crossed his arms under his head.

Chase yawned and he cursed himself for his sick body’s constant need for sleep. Jack chuckled at his frustration and let him lean his head against his side.

“How about the others?” Chase asked. “Did they pass by while I was completely dead to the world?”

“Jackie seems a bit busy right now along with Marvin. You know how those two are when they’re focused on their own projects or jobs. It’s like the entire world disappears and nothing else matters to them,” Jack’s voice was soft with both fondness and exasperation at those duo’s antics. “Remember that time you accidentally sprained one of your legs and had a concussion because you smacked the side of your head against the edge of a table when you fell down while you were attempting one of your more complicated trick shots? Those two idiots only found out two days after cause Henrik had to drag Jackie out from his headquarters because he wasn’t answering his phone and Marv was doing one of those magic projects that he spent days obsessing over.”

Jack shook his head while making a face when he remembered the aftermath.

“Henrik gave them some harsh tongue lashing after that. I thought he was going to kill them on the spot,” Jack murmured and slid his arms out from behind his head and slipped one under Chase’s neck as a makeshift pillow. “Can’t say I’d blame him for being so angry though.”

Chase slumped down at that. The memory of that day was blurry because of his headache but he could still remember the gist.

“You were too.” He softly pointed out, remembering the blank look that had shifted over Jack’s face while he avoided looking at the other two.

“Course I was… What if that had been a serious emergency? Two days would’ve already been far too late for them to come back,” Chase glanced at Jack’s face and noticed that he has the same expression that he had back then.

“They’re always on time when it’s for important stuff,” he defended his two older brothers and Jack turned this time to look him in the eyes.

“And you’re not important stuff?” There was a storm lurking beneath those eyes as he quietly asked him that damned question.

He could feel the blood in his face draining out at the snapback. Chase shuddered and looked away from those far too seeing eyes. A lump had grown inside his throat and he had to painfully swallow it down before he could answer.

“Can we not… talk about that? Please?” He pleaded and looked back with cracked glass for eyes.

Jack’s pensive look fell at that sight and he immediately turned over to tug Chase into his arms. Chase hid his face against his chest and shivered, trying to keep his heart together.

“Aw… You know I hate it when you look at me like that. It always feels like I kicked a wounded puppy or something,” Jack rested his cheek on top of Chase’s fluffy hair and rubbed the back of his neck to get him to relax. “I just don’t like it when you think that you’re the least important among all of us just because you seem the most normal, Chaser.”

Chase bit down the bitter words ‘aren’t I?’ and settled for pressing his ear on top of Jack’s chest and listening to the calming sound of his heartbeat.

The light atmosphere had been tainted by the sudden downturn of their conversation. He felt Jack breathe in and heave out a sigh before the older man began to tap his fingers up and down his spine.

“Sorry for ruining the mood, Chase,” Jack truly sounded very apologetic and this time it was Chase’s turn to feel like **_he_** just kicked a sad puppy. “I know you don’t like talking about these sorts of topics…”

“‘S alright. ‘M just not in the mood to get therapy especially from _you_.” Chase mumbled, injecting some sass at the end to lighten up the mood again.

He was relieved when he heard Jack snort at his half-assed joke.

“I’ll have you know I’m a good talker **_and_** listener,” He felt the chest pressed against his ear expand with Jack’s faked angry huff.

Chase just laughed and shook his head with a fond smile teasing at the edge of his lips, “I know.”

He closed his eyes and found himself easing drifting back into the world of dreams especially when he feels so safe and warm in his watchful older brother’s arms.

The man who had just fallen asleep doesn’t notice the comforting hand that had been previously rubbing the back of his neck grab the back collar of his shirt as if to pull him away from its disgruntled owner. It paused when Chase whimpered and curled deeper into his arms. A few seconds later, the hand relaxed and just settled on the middle of his back.

“Gone running back to the world of dreams again, Chaser? Careful now… Someone might just mistake your running away as a desire to replace Jackaboy in his coma,” Anti muttered.

He paused.

Chase was warm, Anti had noticed now. It wasn’t just because of his fever but his soul… It felt like he was sleeping near the fireplace while it was in the middle of winter.

“...” Anti decided to give in and indulge himself just this once. He closed his eyes and realized that perhaps this was the most peaceful and silent his normally buzzing mind has ever been. “Goodnight, Chaser. Get well soon.”

* * *

Chase woke up to Jack’s back touching against his own. He couldn’t help but quirk up a tiny grin at the soft sound of snoring coming from the other man. And Jack said that he doesn’t snore…

He took inventory of his own body’s current stats. The headache was practically gone, leaving a dull numb throb that felt more like a heavy weight on his head rather than anything painful. His body still feels weak and he doesn’t trust himself to jump around the stairs but he thinks that he’s getting there. His head and sight was also much clearer now, the world doesn’t feel like it’s constantly five inches away from his grasp and he’s not getting that falling down the rabbit hole weightlessness so he’s counting that as a win.

He reached up to feel the back of his hand against his forehead and let out a soundless sigh when it still felt hotter than normal. Well… He can’t exactly expect himself to immediately get better just because he spent an entirely relaxing day sleeping away. At least he’s not boiling from the inside anymore.

Chase looked around and caught sight of his phone on the drawer on his side of the bed. He wonders how the rest of the world was doing and wanted to get a peek before he decided to go for more naps. He moved slowly so that he didn't disturb the snoring man from his sleep and grabbed his phone. He pressed the side button and waited for it to boot up.

Once his phone screen fully loaded (both of his lock screen and wallpaper is of him and his brothers which never failed to make him smile), he froze when a text notification popped up on his screen.

**Dr. Adam:  
** _I’d like to think that you just took my advice  
And that’s why you’re not visiting your brother today.  
Well… I truly hope you’re fine, Mister Brody.  
We’ve detected no changes from the patient as usual  
But I think you’d still want to know  
Have a good day. :)_

He felt his body go cold as the blood drained out of him from the sight of that message. Every single memory of the past months began to play in front of his head like old cinema reels and he was hyper aware of the person who had somehow turned around while he was unaware and slowly wrapped an arm around his chest.

“ _Aww…_ I guess our little game of pretend is finally over,” Chase’s breath quickened and he could feel the corners of his sight growing dark while his blood roared in his ears. His shaking body was pulled close against the person who was giggling at his unfortunate state. “It’s almost such a shame… Did you have fun, Chaser? I certainly did.”

Those crooned words were spoken with such relished delight that grew along with the cold numbness that was spreading through his body.

“You were having so much fun too! I think that was the happiest I’ve ever seen you it’s almost _pathetic_ ,” Anti hissed the last word in a mixture of horrid amusement and disgust, “you were laughing and smiling so much, so convinced that your precious Jack never left and that your neglectful older brothers was just a phone away. That everything that happened was just a _long **nightmare**_.”

And then the shaking stopped and Chase was still… So still that for a brief second, Anti thought he had passed out.

“... up…” Anti arched an eyebrow when he heard Chase mumble something far too low for him to understand.

He leaned over and placed his chin on Chase’s shoulder in a mockery of their previously affectionate gestures.

“Pardon?” He sarcastically asked while he tilted his head closer to the mumbling man’s head as if he was craning his ears to hear a whispered secret. “Gotta pipe up a bit louder there, little brother.”

Despite expecting the possible outburst that would come from the tormented man in his arms, Anti didn’t predict that he would have the energy nor the strength to suddenly grip the wrist of the arm that was wrapped around his chest and manage to take advantage of his surprise to fling it off him and push him down on the bed. Chase swung around and straddled Anti, to slam his fists over and over the demon’s chest.

“Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up!” Chase crouched over the older ego, his blue eyes wide and streaming rivers of tears. His lips were bared into a snarl as he kept hitting Anti’s chest. “Why couldn’t you have just shut your mouth? Why couldn’t you just leave me alone and let me forget this entire thing ever happened? Why? **_Why?_** ”

Anti didn’t retaliate. He just watched his little brother’s agonized but **_furious_** tantrum as he lashed out at him. Those tears fell on Anti’s blank face, sliding down his cheeks, while Chase sobbed on top of him.

Those normally fragile blue eyes **_blazed_** with hatred despite the shakiness in that gaze. Yet despite the agony, despite the heartrending loneliness that lurked beneath the mask of anger, Anti could see that the spark that he thought had gone out for a very long time was burning ever brighter than the sun.

A slow smile curled up the corner of his lips as the hits slowly began to lose strength and Chase just hid his face away against his balled up fists while they’re digging into Anti’s chest.

“I hate you… I hate you so much…” Chase hiccuped on a low sob. “Stop it… Stop wearing his face… Stop acting like him to toy with me just to see me react to your bullshit…”

“You’re not Jack. You will **_never_** be Jack.” The shattered man gritted out, the tears never ending as he finally collapsed on top of the demon who merely reached up to start playing with his hair.

That familiar tender gesture was just another stab into Chase’s broken heart.

“But you want me to be, don’t you?” Anti whispered the damning truth into existence.

The words had been stolen out of Chase’s throat. He wanted to deny those words with all the vehemence he could muster. He wanted to yell more, scream more but he couldn’t. He couldn’t spit out such a heavy lie.

So instead he obfuscated, avoiding the harsh truth as he always did. He could’ve pushed Anti away, could’ve rolled over to the cold floor to get away from the touch that was making his skin crawl but he didn’t.

“I hate you… I hate you…” Chase continued whispering those words until his throat had grown hoarse and his eyes were swollen shut with how much he had been crying.

Anti never said anything, never moved to do anything other than letting Chase lay on top of him. He continued to treat him carefully as if he was glass that would shatter at the slightest pressure.

…

All these gentleness probably hurt Chase more than if he had laid his knife on him or taunted him with his weakness.

He fell asleep to the feel of those hands gently wiping his tears away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hit me up at asherranceoftheheart.tumblr.com if you guys have any questions about this story or just wanted to chat! :D


	3. The Good Doctor Comes Home

Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up feeling both numb, and raw and sensitive on the inside and thinking ‘Ah. It’s one of **_those_** days…’ and wondering if it’s even worth the effort to open your eyes and _move_?

Chase felt emotionally and physically drained with a rocking throbbing headache as he woke up in a cold empty bed, tucked in like a child under the blankets. He stared up at the ceiling blankly, looking and thinking of nothing in particular until the memories began to come in crystal clear film in his mind. His hand twitched as he remembered the warmth of another person enveloping him even if that person had been his mortal enemy.

A part of him wanted to hate himself for missing, for _yearning_ for the addicting affectionate touches that his enemy showered him with while he had been dreadfully sick. After all, had he become so desperate after nearly nine months of having no positive physical contact with other people that he would take comfort in the demon who was the **_main cause_** for why it was happening in the first place? However, a bigger part of himself was just tired, so very tired of the constant emotional olympics his self-hatred would force him to go through every single day.

He closed his eyes and for a moment, he allowed his own mind and heart to fool himself and pretend that the last part of yesterday never happened. He chose to believe in the fleeting happiness of the illusion that his best friend had never gone into a coma and tht Anti was merely a part of an excruciatingly long nightmare.

When he opened his eyes again, the sun had gone down outside but he can’t find the energy in himself to give a fuck about time moving on without him.

Chase heard his phone buzz with new notifications. He stomped down the flickering spark of hope that it would be any of his brothers finally answering his messages and calls. He knows that he can’t keep blocking out the world like this especially when the world needs him to be Jack McLoughlin so with an exhausted grunt, he slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and reached over to the left bedside drawer to grab his phone.

He pressed the button on the side and was relieved to see that it was just Doctor Adam rather than one of Jack’s friends asking Jack if he was alright.

Dr. Adam:  
 **Mr. Brody? You haven’t replied to my messages for a while.  
Is everything alright?**

The concern from the doctor melted some of the ice numbing his heart. This man really reminded him of Henrik albeit softer and more formal.

Chase:  
 **I’m ok doc.  
But I don’t think I’ll be able to drop by for a while.  
Think I caught a bug on the way back or something and I don’t want to transfer any of it to Jack.  
I’ll try to take a few more days off until I’m sure I’m okay. :)**

Dr. Adam:  
 **Ah! I thought so…  
You’ve never missed a day visiting your brother unless you were really sick.  
So I was worried. But since you said that you’re okay I have to trust that you know yourself and your limits by now.  
Do take care of yourself! Get a lot of sleep, eat something even if it’s just buttered toast (altho I would prefer if you ate healthier foods…), drink lots of liquid, and make sure you take your medicine.**

Chase:  
 **Yea, I’ve been doing all that  
Just keep me updated on Jack pls?**

Dr. Adam:  
 **But of course, I know how much you worry over your brother.  
Anyway, I’ll leave you to rest.  
I hope you get well soon!**

‘I hope I do too, Doc.’ Chase wiped a hand over his weary face with a loud sigh.

He placed his phone down on his bed when his eyes caught sight of something sharing the same drawer that his phone had been placed in earlier. It was his medicine and it was placed on top of what appeared to be a note. He knows what the pills were obviously for but the note awakened some of his curiosity and anger.

It was obvious who wrote that note.

He wanted to run over to his desk and grab his lighter to burn that seemingly innocent looking white paper as anybody with a shred of common sense should. However he knows himself. He knows his curiosity over what the note would contain would itch at him for a long long time if he didn’t find out what it said.

He inhaled deeply and slowly let the air out as a low hiss through gritted teeth while he mussed up his already messed up hair.

“Fucker,” Chase insulted both the demon for taking advantage of his thrice damned curiosity that could rival the stubbornness of a spoiled cat, and himself for falling for this obvious show of manipulation as he forced his arm to reach out and grabbed the paper.

He crumpled the note into a wrinkly ball and stared down at it with some trepidation. What horrific message will this paper contain? Was it going to contain some blackmail worthy secret? Maybe taunt him for his complete breakdown yesterday? Jesus Christ… He literally fell apart on top of the bastard. He’d wish he could erase the memory but Anti would probably take that as permission to completely fuck him up mentally and maybe possess him as a little treat.

Well, he can’t keep stalling for more time like a coward. He uncrumpled the paper, smoothing it out on his covered lap, and read it with some trepidation.

**_One pill every eight hours from the moment you wake up.  
Going to be busy for a while. Don’t wait up for me, little brother.  
You’re still sick so don’t have a breakdown every other hour.  
Remember  
I’M ALWAYS WATCHING_ **

Chase stared down at the note that was practically dripping with sarcasm with an expressionless gaze. A form of calm had settled down upon him and he almost absentmindedly started to rip the note in half. He doesn’t know what to feel about the laughably simple note. Should he get angry? Should he spend the time away from the bastard trying to decode some sort of hidden message from it?

In the end, he decided that it wasn’t worth the energy to get annoyed or obsessed over the taunt. He spent the next few minutes tearing the note into teeny tiny pieces before he left it scattered all over the top of his lap in unsalvageable scraps.

The ripping and tearing actually brought him some satisfaction which he relished in no matter how tiny it was. He swept the mess off his bed with a wide wave and watched it free fall to the floor like snow during winter. The man slid off his bed and spitefully ignored the medicine before he dragged himself over to the bathroom to freshen up.

He took a short shower, changed into fresh new indoor clothes, and dried his hair with a towel before brushing it up until it stayed neat and fluffy on his head. A sudden burst of productive energy suddenly shot through his entire body when he looked over the entirety of his room and realized just how filthy he had let it become over the months.

Chase could almost hear Anti sneering at him at the back of his head, telling him how useless and broken he was when nobody is there to pull him forward like a fucking donkey.

A massive wave of spite mixed in with his burst of energy and he began walking around the room to gather up his dirty clothes to put inside a hamper that he carried over to his laundry room to load up inside the washing machine. Then before working the machine, he went back to his room to change his bed sheets and blanket to a clean one before hefting them all up to the laundry room. While the washer was humming and vibrating as it got to work, he grabbed two big trash bags from his current location before he walked back to his bedroom.

**_The first step to feeling better after another one of your long episodes is to clear up the clutter that built up around you. It will help you associate clearing up as another way of resetting your own point of view._ **

A tiny smile twitched up at the corner of his lips as Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice as he coaxed him from his bed in the past. He separated his trash into two bags and straightened up to look around his now cleaner room. Chase tied up the trash bags so that none of them would spill out before he opened up his window and smiled faintly at the refreshing evening breeze that brushed against his heated face.

Then he walked over to his closet to bring out the Roomba that he hasn’t used for a while, letting out a victorious ‘heh’ when it still worked and placed it in the middle of his room before turning it on to roam around the floor to suck up the dust that built up over the past months.

He gave his cleaner and brighter bedroom another look over with satisfaction pulsing in his chest before making two trips up and down the stairs to take out the trash that he just collected and move the piled up dirty mugs on his desk down to the kitchen.

“How’s this for being useless and broken, asshole?” Chase spitefully said into the empty air towards the absent being who insulted him daily when he was there. “Fuck you.”

Chase huffed to himself in the middle of the kitchen while he was crouched over his dishwasher, loading it up with all the dirty dishes. After he closed the thing’s door, he realized as his stomach growled rather loudly, that he was pretty hungry.

“I’m hungry but I’m not in the mood for anything too heavy or chewy…” Chase hummed while he browsed the contents of his fridge. He leaned over and grabbed the covered bowl at the back of the fridge. “Oh hey, this was the cream of mushroom soup I ordered a week ago… It doesn’t smell bad so I guess it’s still fine!”

He heated it up on the stove before scooping them all up into a clean bowl. He placed a spoon with it before he walked over to the living room. Chase turned on the TV before laying on his side at the couch while he slurped up his soup.

‘Man… If Hen was here he’d probably be telling me that this soup isn’t healthy enough for me,’ Chase chuckled to himself, eyes misting over with nostalgia over the memories of his most fussy older brother. ‘Then he’d threaten to tie me up on a chair and feed me his horrid homemade food.’

Henrik might be one of the smartest people in the world but his cooked food… There’s a reason why he was never allowed to cook for them during their weekly gatherings. He remembered Marvin telling him a story about his first time of coming into contact with Henrik’s Mystery Food and swearing on his name and magic that it had a **_living soul_**.

_“It’s **not** that bad!” He would hear Henrik stomping his feet on the floor while imagining the lethal glare he’d give his brothers while they gently redirected him even as he’s protesting the discrimination loudly from the kitchen._

_“Henrik **please** … Every single bite Jackie makes of your food immediately sends him to the hospital and you of all people know that he’s immune to nearly all sorts of poison.” Jack squeezed the fuming doctor’s tensed shoulders in an attempt to calm him down._

_“Come on, Jack-Jack. You don’t have to sweeten the truth up for our mother hen,” Marvin’s delighted and mischief-filled voice would snicker from the other room where he was probably curled up on the floor near the window to get the maximum sunshine. “Henrik, your food tastes so bad that Jackie’s mind blocked out any memory of the taste to protect him from relieving the trauma.”_

_“As if **your** cooking is any better!” Henrik would shoot back scathingly._

_“At least I can survive on it on my own and feed some of it to others!” Marvin would have puffed up as he readied himself for their banter._

_“Guys please,” Jackie, ever the peacemaker, would try to calm the duo down while Jack wouldn’t even try and raise the white flag the second they start._

Chase laughed to himself at the present time as he recalled the loud racket Marvin and Henrik would make while they exchanged light-hearted insults. He would’ve been in the kitchen, humming and smiling while he busied himself with his cooking. A few minutes later would find Creator and Hero skulking back to his safe grounds with their tails tucked neatly between their legs and trying to help him but he’d just easily shoo them off to pout at the kitchen table.

‘I wish Jamie had experienced that before everything went to complete shit,’ Chase’s smile turned bittersweet at that stray thought. ‘Henrik and Jack would’ve loved him. He and Hen would probably spend some nights drinking tea in the middle of the night with each other. He’d have helped curtail some of Marvy’s sharp nature with a light smack on the shoulder. Jackie would’ve been so glad to have someone helping him act as the peacemaker of the family. Jack… Jack would’ve **_adored_** him. He’d gush about how Jamie was so spirited, so sassy, expressive and—and how he and Marvy always loved so fiercely…’

Chase licked his spoon clean (Marvin would’ve been looking at him with disgust and tell him that he’s a mannerless savage which… bold words for someone who would lick their balls while in their cat form) and dropped it down with a loud ear ringing clang on the now empty bowl before placing them on the living room table. He scooched over and laid down on his back on the couch and crossed his arms at the back of his head as a makeshift pillow while he reminisced.

Anti might insult him for doing nothing else but think of the past but it was the only thing that gave Chase the energy to keep moving forward even if he didn’t really want to. For the sake of all his loved ones who would’ve wanted to experience those memories in the future with them after all of these bullshit… Yeah, he’d trudge through all the painful days for them.

He closed his eyes and tried his darnest to remember anything memorable that had happened since the others left ~~him behind~~ but other than Anti’s unforgettable presence, everything else passed by in a blur.

“Damn,” Chase sighed, his smile lacking any light nor humor to it. “Anti really had a point when he said that I’m useless without the others huh?”

**_It is not your fault, Chase. Depression has the tendency to mix all your memories together in an unrecognizable blur. Do not worry. We are always here to help you remember._ **

“Unfortunately Doc,” Chase sighed as he sat up and grabbed the dirty bowl and spoon to place them together in the washer. “The only person left who’ll help me remember the past months is a complete bastard who I wouldn’t entrust my head to even if I had to choose between him and pain.”

Not that he really wanted to remember anything… He’s pretty sure that if he remembered anything it would just be of him whining about his loneliness, Anti fucking him up, and trying to keep up the Jack mask so that nobody else would find out that something had gone wrong.

He went back upstairs and moved the wet clothes from the washing machine to the dryer and loaded up the dirty bed sheets and blanket to the washing machine before heading straight for his bedroom. The Roomba died under his desk, having lost all of its battery while he was downstairs, and he scrounged through his dark closet for its charging adapter. Once the Roomba was set up and charging, he changed into his new pajamas and slipped back under his blankets.

He continued ignoring the set of pills on the drawer and turned on his side so that he could curl up under the sheets. Chase powered on Jack’s phone and waited for it to load so that he could check the comatose man’s social media. Another mentally and emotionally draining part of his imitation job was to maintain the Jack mask while pretending that the man was A-Okay and there was no reason for concern.

First, he pulled up Twitter and made a face when he realized that **_somebody_** posted something on the account while he was sick. Thank god it was just a little message to everyone that he was going to be on a break for a while because he was sick. It was still creepy that Anti could perfectly copy Jack’s mannerisms as he looked through the little retweets-interaction with everybody. Even he had some hard time fully copying his best friend’s posting quirks.

Either way, it was still annoying and stressful to Chase how the demon could keep pulling these kinds of shit with Jack’s social media. Maybe he should change to passwords and login info to everything while Anti was god knows where.

…

Chase sighed and shrugged. Then again, it’s not like that would be effective anyway. He knows that Anti was the one who keeps reblogging art of himself on the tumblr account even though he was pretty sure he changed the password nearly fifty times over the past few months. It never fazed him.

Speaking of tumblr… A part of him wanted to resent the community for giving the demon so much power through their attention via art, theories, and stories but he knows that it wouldn’t be fair of him to blame them for something that is completely out of their control. It’s not like they knew that the thing with Anti which they knew to be an ‘ARG-like’ story for the channel was actually his and his brother’s reality. Most of them were just people who were enthusiastic for the escapism their ‘story’ provided and he couldn’t exactly fault them for that.

He decided to update twitter that he’s feeling much better than before and that he’ll go back to filming videos tomorrow. The replies were almost immediate as the community reassured him that it would be fine if he took more days off to recover fully and he can’t help but smile at their unending support even if it was actually directed towards Jack. He **_knows_** that they wouldn’t mind it if he took an entire week off but he gets really antsy when he’s not putting up any content for the channel.

It feels like if he doesn’t keep it up, there’ll be nothing left for Jack to wake up to, all the hard work he put into this channel and community has been one of his brother’s ultimate joys. He doesn’t want to see Jack’s devastation if he also loses the community that he so dearly loved to the coma.

Besides… It’s not like he can afford to slack off while the others are trying their hardest to save Jack. This and taking care of Jack was the only thing that he could do to be of some use rather than become another burden to his brothers.

After he read and replied to a few more retweets, he turned off Twitter and moved his attention to the other big gathering place for the community. He tapped Tumblr’s app button and scrolled down Jack’s blog and let out a sharp, annoyed exhale when he saw that Anti had been busy reblogging things related to him or him torturing the other egos while Chase had been indisposed. A lot of the theorists hit the nail on the head when they theorized that the one who had been reblogging Anti-related things without any caption had been Anti.

It must have been something about Tumblr’s wonky programming but Anti can’t say anything or it’ll come out all glitched and zalgoed. Of course, he could’ve gotten maximum attention that way but he probably thought that it would be much better to have the fans stewing and trying to obsess over every single action that may or may not relate to Anti by having it all be a mystery.

Sometimes Chase wondered if maybe he and his brothers could make use of the community’s eagle-eyed observations that tend to hit right most of the time to help them find out a way to save Jack. He’s lost count of how many times they’ve managed to notice something that he hasn’t noticed such as a little subtle glitch on the video’s audio, a flash of **_someone_** in the back of his facecam, or even changes in the description or titles of the videos that was definitely not made by him.

Their skills would’ve been impressive if it wasn’t downright frightening for how obsessed they seem to be with Anti.

He reblogged a few cool artworks and edits with little words of encouragement under their captions. Then he’d like some of the little sneak peeks to the daily lives of the community members that always made him smile because at least these funky little people are doing their best to live. It’s a nice reminder and boost to the morale that there was a reason why he was also doing this other than to keep the channel up and running for Jack’s comeback.

Chase stretched out his arms and legs with a jawbreaking yawn as he felt the sleepiness settle in. He looked at the time on his phone and made a face when he saw how late it was. No wonder his eyes were starting to blur with sleep. He decided to set his alarm clock up for the morning. He’s gotta wake up early to prepare himself to go under the Jack mask and record a video after all.

The tired man scooched underneath the blanket, covering himself up to his bed and curled up into a tight ball while tugging the sheets around him. A spark of pride welled up inside his chest when he thought back on how he managed to do a little bit of productivity in tidying up his bedroom. While he definitely started out the day rough and numb, he managed to salvage it by the end.

**_At the end of the day, it’s these teeny tiny baby steps that would bring you much farther than you thought when you look back in the future. So do not sell yourself short, Chase Brody._ **

**_Never forget that we are always proud of you no matter how inconsequential you believe your little progress was._ **

Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice echoed through his mind, easily drowning out all the insecurities and dark voices sneering at him for his pride. For the first time in a long while, Chase fell asleep with a faint but sincere smile on his lips.

* * *

“Maybe you should’ve jumped higher for that trick shot so that you wouldn’t have fallen over and broken your foot,” Jack’s voice shook with silent laughter as he leaned on Chase’s side while they both watched Henrik scrambling around, fussing over Chase’s foot that was placed in a cast, and fluffing up pillows to squeeze behind Chase’s back while he’s relaxed on the couch and worrying his head over whether his broken foot was raised high enough.

Henrik spun around and levelled a death glare towards his creator who instinctively raised both hands in a show of harmlessness, the doctor bared his teeth at him, “If you keep encouraging him to do more reckless acts I **_will_** break **_your_** own leg.”

Chase coughed and choked on a laugh and gave his doctor older brother a smile full of innocence and sunshine when he swiftly turned around to glare at him as well while Jack sputtered in the background. Jackie was dying on the floor. He sounded like he was about to upgrade from his booming cackling to wheezing, dying laughter.

“Wh— You took an oath to never harm another human when you became a doctor!” Chase turned his head to look at Jack when he felt him sitting up straight and leaning forward with an outraged look.

“I did no such thing,” Henrik snubbed. “It was whichever fake Schneeplestein that magic made to explain my existence in this universe that made such an oath.”

“You’re **_still_** a doctor!” Jack yelled vehemently, slapping a hand on his knees.

Henrik sniffed. He looked down at Jack from behind his nose and made him feel like he was some worm tainting the bottom of his shiny shoes. Then the doctor dramatically turned his back on the pouting man obviously giving him the cold shoulder.

“Chaaaase,” Jack twisted his body to ‘sob’ into his best friend’s shoulder. “Henny’s being mean to me again!”

“There, there,” Chase snickered as he patted the older man’s curly hair. “I won’t let the big bad doctor bully you anymore.”

Jack turned his head so that his cheek was pressed on top of Chase’s shoulder and he stuck his tongue out at Henrik who rolled his eyes back at him.

A massive white maine coone glided into the chaotic living room, jumping up on the back of the couch, and strolled over to smack Jack’s face with his outrageously long and fluffy tail—while ignoring the annoyed yelp ‘Marvin!’ before the poor man started sneezing and cursing the magician’s existence—as he slid down a bemused Chase’s torso into his lap. He rubbed his fluffy body against his little brother’s chest with a loud meow for his greeting.

“Hey to you too, Marvy,” Chase chuckled as the cat began to purr.

Marvin’s purr grew louder until he was practically like a growling motorcycle and arched his spine when Chase’s fingers stroked him from the bridge of his pink nose down to his tailbone. The heavy white cat kneaded his claws into Chase’s baggy shorts before circling around—ignoring Chase’s agonized groan at his weight—and curling up into a smug self-satisfied ball on his lap.

“You satisfied now, Drama Queen?” Chase teased the magician with a fond smile while he scratched the cat on the perfect spot behind his ears. “I think we should put your cat form on a diet. You’re getting pretty heavy.”

The cat nipped at his fingers with a hint of a warning bite but Chase just tapped his prickly older brother on his nose as a gentle reprimand. He only got a bunch of annoyed chattering for his daring gall to touch his majesty.

“Marvin, you better not bite anyone again,” Henrik dryly warned the magician who hissed at him. “Don’t think I can’t sedate you into going to the vet and getting you neutered.”

Marvin let out an offended yowl and attempted to stuff his massive unit of a body under Chase’s shirt, drawing giggles from the man who tried pushing his fluffy butt away as his squirming body dragged his soft fur over his ticklish stomach.

“Marvin, **_you fucker!_** ” Chase squealed and tried to pull out the squirming cat who somehow managed to find the perfect position and perk out only his head from under his shirt. “Really? You’re going to subject me to your stinky butt for the entire movie marathon?”

His only response was a thick tail that thwapped his sputtering face.

“Aww… It’s just his way of showing you his love, Chasey-wasey,” Jackie giggled without looking up from his phone. “Also I can’t blame Marv for wanting to snuggle up to you. You’re like a portable heater slash teddy bear.”

“Yeah well, I’d say Marvy would be like a teddy bear too if it weren’t for the fact that he weighs like a rock on top of my kidneys,” Chase deadpanned before smacking Marvin’s back through his shirt irritably. “Use your claws on me again and I’ll neuter you myself without the help of a vet.”

Jack snickered at the irritated mewl from the cat while Henrik huffed and rolled his eyes at their antics. The doctor sat on the right couch seat and pulled the side lever up so that he could fully recline his body and feet. Jack leaned over and grabbed the remote from the table in front of him and Chase.

“Everybody finally settled down for our movie night?” He asked, just to make sure so that nobody would suddenly whine in that childish sort of voice that he didn’t wait for them again.

_coughJackiecough_

Jackie gave him a thumbs up and finally looked up from his phone. He was laying on his stomach on the blanket he set on the floor with a variety of pillows forming his nest around him. His own bowl of popcorn and a massive bottle full of Sprite was set in front of him.

Chase makes an agreeing grunt while he leaned on him on his side, taking care not to move his cast while Marvin chirruped from under his shirt, his little head poking out directing his nose to the bowl of popcorn on the table. Henrik just shrugged and gestured his head towards the screen.

“Just get on with it. If anybody was not ready I am sure that they’ll be letting out some godforsaken complaint through their loud mouths,” Henrik scathingly said but his eyes glimmered with laughter, taking off the bite from his words. He merely arched an eyebrow at everyone when they childishly stuck out their tongues at him.

Jack huffed and shook his head at the brotherly banters. No family activity would be the same without these chaotic preparations and quips from the others. He pressed play on the remote and started the movie. He sat back on the couch with Chase, his smile unconsciously growing wider when the youngest ego scooched closer to him.

…

“Is he asleep?” Henrik asked in a hushed tone as he craned his neck to look at Chase’s face which was hiding away against Jack’s side.

Jack nodded with a gentle smile and pressed a finger against his lips in the universal sign for silence. He slowly began to shift himself so that he could move Chase into laying down fully on the couch and for his head to be placed on his lap. Henrik assisted him, carrying the younger ego’s legs into the couch and made sure that his injured foot was raised with a few pillows propped underneath and around it to keep it from moving.

Chase made a soft noise and pressed his cheek on Jack’s stomach while the older man petted his head, idly rubbing a thumb against the healed over scar that would ache from time to time especially when Chase is particularly emotional. The sleeping man sighed contentedly in his sleep and murmured something far too unintelligible for either man to hear. Henrik grabbed one of the free blankets remaining to place it over Chase, tucking him under the warm sheets.

“I’ll get the other blankets—Marvin!” Henrik hissed as the cat that had been watching them from the table, slowly walked over to jump on Chase’s chest. Chase’s breath hitched but thankfully he didn’t wake up. Chase wrapped his arms around the cat who had stretched himself out over his little brother’s body and tucked his head under his chin. “You’re _so lucky_ he’s a heavy sleeper. If you woke him up I would have shaved you, you needy cat.”

The cat flicked his ears at Henrik and made a show of nuzzling the bottom of Chase’s chin and purring almost as loud as a starting motorcycle to spite the doctor by showing just how comfortable he was in his makeshift bed.

Jack rolled his eyes at the little drama queen before he looked back at Henrik with a pleading smile, “Blankets please? It’s pretty chilly around here at night.”

Henrik sighed and nodded. He carefully maneuvered himself out of the crowded living room. Jackie had spreaded out his entire body on his own side of the room, snoring lightly while drool trailed down his cheek. Henrik made sure that he didn’t touch on the territory of the unknowing human venus flytrap who’d snap his arms around your legs in a flash the moment you stepped within his area of attack. Last time one of them (poor Marvin… despite screaming and trying to squirm out of those iron arms...) fell for that trap, they had to deal with a clingy as a leech Jackie for the entire night.

He went upstairs to grab extra blankets and pillows for him and Jack since someone ( _Jackie…_ ) hoarded most of them for their nest and one of the original blankets was placed over Chase. When he went back down, Marvin was already asleep, his cat body slowly moved up and down to his rhythmic breathing. Jack was staring down at Chase’s face with a blank look which generally meant that the man was probably thinking something that was bothering him again.

As he passed by his creator, he gave the man a gentle smack on the back of his head with his elbow. “This is not the time for complicated thoughts. This is family time.”

Jack jolted at the hit and his voice, turning his head to make a silly face at him.

“I know, I know, I just can’t help it, Hen,” Jack sighed and patted Chase’s head. He peered at the doctor when he saw what he was carrying. “Huh, you got those from the closet in the hallway?”

“Where else would I get it? Here,” Henrik made Jack lean over so that he could place two pillows on the back of his neck. “Support for your neck.”

“Thanks,” the other man gave him a thumbs up with one of his free hands. “Can you uh place my blanket over my lap? I’ll move Chase’s head a bit.”

“Wait your impatient butt. I am just going to move around the couch.” Henrik said as he walked over to his own spot to drop his pillows and blanket before moving over to Jack.

Jack carefully lifted Chase’s head so that Henrik could slip the blanket over his lap. He absentmindedly rubbed a thumb over the sleeping man’s head when his brows furrowed at the movement and he looked like he was about to wake from his sleep. Thankfully, he settled down once he was returned to his previous position only he curled closer to his creator’s warmth.

“Ah man, Chase really is the best little brother I could ever ask for,” Jack sighed with a fond smile softening the weariness from his face.

Henrik snorted, giving Chase a little pat on his head before he walked back to his couch chair and dropped his body on it.

“And you say you don’t play favorites,” Henrik accusingly narrowed his eyes at Jack who stuck his tongue out at him.

“And I’ll keep saying it no matter how much you guys accuse me of it,” Jack grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

The doctor rolled his eyes before spreading his own blanket over him. He turned over on his side and snubbed Jack with his back, ignoring the ‘Oh real mature, Henrik!’ that Jack shot towards him quietly.

“Goodnight Mister McLoughlin,” Henrik said in the snobbiest tone he could muster.

“Are you seri— Oh _whatever_ , goodnight to you too, Doctor Schneeplestein.” He heard Jack huff and mutter something incomprehensible with his distance under his breath.

Henrik stifled a smile and his chuckle as he felt his creator fake pouting even with his back turned against him.

As he closed his eyes, he was highly aware of the sounds of soft breathing (or snoring in Jackie’s case…) coming from everyone in the room and he thinks that it’s the most beautiful sound he has ever heard his entire life.

He wished that he could stay in this single moment in time for as long as he wanted, to engrave it in his memories for when the nights are cold and when deep regrets are keeping him awake.

* * *

“Testing! Teeeeesting… Alright, the mic and audio seems to be okay,” Chase squinted at his face cam, flicking a finger in front of its lens to get its autofocus clearing up on his face. He brightened up when the camera finally focused just right! “Attaboy! Now we can finally start recording.”

He’s done his vocal warmups before he started setting up everything and even made sure that the house was nice and locked up and made sure that he doesn’t need to go for a pee break for one to two hours. Those moments are always a hassle and awkward for him and Robin to cut out. Not to mention it’s always a bit of a distraction especially when he is finally in the zone for the camera.

He also has his own lil water container filled with delicious fresh water in front of him, out of the camera’s point of view, just so he could freshen up his voice from all the screaming and yelling that he was about to do. While voice cracks are fun to jump from from a comedic point, it’s not nice to be known as the loudest Irish youtuber who still has voice cracks like a teenager going through puberty.

The phone has been muted and set on vibrate, and the games have been pulled up and listed on his desktop ready for recording!

Today’s video recording theme is… those medical surgery related games.

It had been an idea that had been drifting around his mind for a while but he didn’t have the mental and emotional energy to bother with the vivid reminders of his missing older brother. Maybe this was just another way of spiting Anti for what he had done to him a two days ago in his vulnerable state just like how his sudden burst of energy fueled him to prove that he wasn’t completely useless all alone by tidying up his wreck of a room in the middle of the night.

He knew that Anti seems to have it out for Henrik just as personally as he has it out for Jack since any mention of his brother has the demon hissing and spitting rage which he found rather peculiar since he’d have thought that the demon would be using what he’s doing to Henrik as another one of his taunts and considering he probably has the upper hand over the doctor right now. He stopped mentioning Henrik after that one moment when Anti had gone frighteningly still with his eyes glowing bloody murder towards him and then disappeared for a few hours. When he came back, he was covered in blood and Chase wisely didn’t ask him from whom it came from.

Since then, they never talked about it although Anti’s presence would be unbearable whenever he played any medical related game since it always felt like the demon was breathing down his neck (although knowing his luck he probably did but since he didn’t care enough to turn around and see that horrifying sight he’d like to believe that it never happened) just **_daring_** him to mention anything about his beloved doctor of a brother. The only time Anti made any comment about Henrik was literally that postcard hack on tumblr. That was a hell of a thing to open the app to.

He could feel the smugness rolling off Anti’s shadowed corner in waves during that day and he had to stop himself from vaulting over the couch to grab the demon who’s been pestering (severe understatement, he knows but still—) him for months and demand what the fuck he’s planning with the postcard.

Anyway, now that Anti wasn’t here (and thank fuck for that) he’s free to record and post this fun little thing for the channel. Honestly, it’s pretty odd to have the past two days of complete silence from Anti but it was also extremely refreshing and absolutely rejuvenating for his spirit. Oh, he didn’t doubt the ‘Always Watching’ threat from his last note but this was the most peaceful and private he’s been for the past months.

Chase adjusted the headset over his ears, checking to make sure that it wasn’t uncomfortable, before he stretched out his arms and body for the long recording session, releasing a satisfied groan at the obscenely loud cracks that his joints made with the stretch.

_Okay… Close your eyes…_

_Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale._

_In the next few hours, Chase Brody will not exist. Instead, another man will take his place. How would he react to certain things and events? How would he act out a carefree skit of a parodied impersonation of their resident doctor?_

_Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale._

_Turn the chair around and…_

**_Click_ **

Something snaps into place as his lips stretched itself out into a familiar crooked goofy grin at the sound of his mouse clicking. The metaphorical mask slipping over his face felt so much more natural than when it was taken off at this point in time. He swung his chair around and greeted the invisible audience on the other side of the screen.

“Hello and welcome back! I am Doctor Jacksepticeye,” he both recognizes and doesn’t recognize the face that was looking back at him on the recording screen, “and welcome to my ER!”

It was easy, always so **_so_** easy to step into _his_ shoes, to become someone who is dearly beloved by so many people, to become someone who has inspired this community to follow him. Every time he slips this mask on for the screen he always experienced this high knowing that for once he won’t be someone who was miserably alone and useless to his loved ones. If he immersed himself deeper into this mask, he could even believe that the people are seeing **_him_** and not Jack but that’s a thought that he’d brush off the moment it lingers at the surface of his mind.

However, while it was highly tempting to keep the mask up even by his lonesome, it always faded away the moment the camera stopped and left him far more drained than before he started recording.

_Stop. Don’t think about that now._

_Chase does not exist at this very moment._

Only Jack remained with that cheerful smile on his lips.

Finally, he allowed himself to fade into the background and push that persona forward to take his place.

In the next blink, Chase closed his eyes and Jack opened them.

* * *

_The deep blue sky stretched over the horizon._

_It was much too big. Much too hopeful._

_It was too much for him who has been stuck in the darkness with no one but Him for company—_

_No._

**_No._ **

_Do not think._

_Not yet._

_Later. Yes, later. In safety. In his family’s safety and warmth._

_The door had been unlocked. Why? Why had it been unlocked?_

_Then he was running, stumbling about in the abyss like a drunk and suddenly there was **light** —_

_It had been too bright, too warm on his cold skin that it felt like it was burning his flesh off like the hot po—_

_No. Regroup. Stop._

_Do. Not. Think. About. It._

_He ran and ran and ran amongst the crowd, deaf to the rude words that had been tossed towards his way when he crashed into someone and jumped away as if he had been shocked, deaf to the concerned strangers’ questions before he shoved their wandering hands away._

_Don’t touch him. **Don’t fucking touch him**!_

_It hurts. His eyes hurt. His ears hurt._

_It’s so loud. ~~He missed the blissfully subtle static that always kept him company in his cell—~~_

_Stop speaking… Stop speaking! Shut up… Shut up. Shutupshutupshutupshutupshutup—_

_The colors began to shift around him and they… became familiar? Familiar streets. Familiar names._

_There was that sound from the annoying dog barking from a neighbor’s—_

Ah.

_This must be another one of his games._

_The front garden was unkempt. Why was it unkempt? There were no flowers blooming from the bushes that looked as dry and thirsty as he normally felt. His little brother loved—loves his gardening hobby. He loves seeing the smiles of the passersby and his family when they see the colorful flowers he’d carefully tend to every week._

_Yes, this was just further proof that this was all an illusion. He wanted to scream. He wanted to tell Him to stop this farce. However, he knows that he must continue the show lest He becomes angry for his disobedience once more._

_He walked on. There. The front door was in front of him. Instinctively, he reached into his coat’s pocket (since when had he started wearing this coat?) and of course, of course, the key was there._

_The door is opened and he is greeted by a cold, silent hou…_

_No._

_Wait._

_He looked up. There was a voice. It was faint but there it is._

_Which show was he putting on this time? A replay of that fateful day? Or perhaps it was another one of those games where He makes him pretend that he was finally free?_

_Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale._

_He walked up the stairs._

_One._

_Two._

_Three._

_The fourth door._

_The Recording Room._

_What sort of cruel joke awaits him behind this door he wondered?_

_He was tired. So **so** tired… Perhaps if he pretended to be the brave, cool headed doctor that he had been He would grow bored of this show quick._

_Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale._

_The ice on the doorknob was a welcome sting to his constantly wandering, constantly moving mind. It keeps him still. Keeps him in the moment ~~just like all of the pain—~~_

**_Take all the shattered pieces of your bravery now, good doctor, and let it all out…_ **

The door was flung open and the familiar—unfamiliar man in the room spun around in his chair and looked up at his heaving, shuddering body with a wide-eyed look. Yes, that face—that impossible face was the face of a comatose man as He often taunted him during their sessions— sat in front of him just told him that this was all just another one of His cruel mind games.

A flash of anger.

A dash of fear.

Then the ridiculous words streamed out of his lips as he pointed a shaking accusing finger angrily, fearfully at the shocked mirage before him.

“I-I am the good doctor,” he started, his voice growing louder to mask the racing, thundering heart attempting to rip itself out of his chest, “and that is my chair!”

“... Henrik?” At that trembling, fragile voice, the mirage shattered and suddenly his baby brother, the one who has always looked up to him like he knew all of the secrets held within this universe… the younger brother who had always, **_always_** undervalued his own existence… The baby brother that he so dearly loved was looking up at him, no traces of the impossible man were left behind. “Henrik, is that you?”

And for a second, he allowed his guard to drop, allowing the fragile piece of hope in his chest to wriggle up the surface of his beaten heart.

“ _Help me_ ,” he begged. His voice was painfully raw and vulnerable as it clawed itself out of his throat.

Then as if he was just a puppet whose cruel puppeteer cut his strings out of nowhere just because he had grown bored of his broken toy, he crumpled forward, all remaining energy in his pathetically weak body dropping to a complete zero, and his legs toppled underneath him. He braced himself to meet the cold unforgiving floor of his cell while his warden cackled at his show of weakness…

But it never came.

Instead, someone caught his body and he was suddenly engulfed in that familiar softness and warmth as two arms gently but firmly wrapped themselves around his bony waist.

“I gotcha… I gotcha big bro. I gotcha,” Henrik closed his eyes and in a fit of broken exhaustion allowed himself to believe in this dream.

“Don’t let this be a dream,” he whimpered. “Don’t… Don’t let me wake up—”

“Shh… It’s not a dream. You’re home. You’ve come home. I promise,” he shuddered at that almost comforting voice and the hand that was stroking the back of his head tenderly. “I’ll still be here when you wake up. I promise.”

Chapped lips were brushed over his forehead and he slipped away into the familiar abyss.

Oh how the good doctor dearly wished that he could remain in this single moment of time rather than face the cruel reality of what was waiting for him the next time he opened his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hit me up at asherranceoftheheart.tumblr.com for more or if you just wanna chat!

**Author's Note:**

> Hit me up at asherranceoftheheart.tumblr.com if you wanna talk or ask me questions about this fic!


End file.
